Week of May 28th - Memorial Day
My heart is often troubled by the evil I see around us, but I know that this place is just a temporary stop-over in the journey of everlasting life. On Memorial Day, as we remember those who have given their lives to secure the freedoms we have, pause to think of what their sacrifice actually means. Sure, the families and neighbors of those who have fallen are touched by indescribable grief by their loss, but to those who have not been directly impacted, what does Memorial Day mean? How can a person who hasn't experienced the loss appreciate the sacrifice? Take a look at an 'average Joe' who has been called up to serve. He's normally a young adult, just starting his life... recently married with a young'un or two... His parents still see him as a rebellious teen, and his friends who went off to college don't understand why he joined. He's looking to give back what was given him, or he's looking for a way to pay for college when he's finished with his commitment. He's young, idealistic, and energetic. If he does not return, his family will miss him, his children will not know him, and the world would have lost an individual worth knowing. One who might have saved someone's life down the line...
But what about the NOT so average that get called up out of their civilian lives? One who saves lives everyday? Here is a message written by a helicopter pilot. His normal job is to save lives flying for Airlift NW, transporting accident victims to hospitals. His Guard unit was called up for duty in Iraq, and he's scheduled to ship out at the end of the summer. He'll be flying Blackhawks for the army and he's training right now in Fort Sill. Although he would undoubtably rather be sitting back in Olympia with his wife and 4 kids, his sense of duty and of honor commits him to this task. Please take the time to read and think about this very above-average Joe who isn't 'your average GI' as you consider all that one gives up to serve.
My therapist told me if I shared my experiences with others it may help curb my suicidal thoughts; so you are the others. Anyone from ALNW please feel free to pass this on, only to those who want it. I still do not have internet access yet so don’t worry about writing back. Time at Camp…Army Camp.I thought I’d write yet another note; for two reasons, to let you guys know how your tax dollars are being spent and so I have a written record for myself the next time I think back on “all the great times” I had on active duty. As I looked back on my previous active duty time all I could remember was the “good” times. I’m pretty sure it’s some kind of psychological defense mechanism that I have forgotten all those bad things that have happened to me in the past on active duty. Now that I’m back in the active duty all those not so good times are rushing back to the forefront of my mind. This will probably be a long drawn out and boring letter, as I will keep adding on to it, so if you have anything else more important to do; say picking up after the dog and don’t get around to reading this, I totally understand.So what have I been doing since I’ve gotten to Ft. Sill? Well, after the last letter I sent I am happy to report the Army has found it in their heart to begin paying me! I’m confident this has saved my marriage. When Beth found out I was not getting paid by Uncle Sam she asked me to remind her why we got married in the first place! I also had my IPod returned to me, unfortunately it was two days AFTER I bought a new 30GB video IPod for $250. Some Marines found it on their HUMVEE and after listening to the late 70’s and early 80”s music found the oldest guy on post and gave it back. That is the good news.I feel as if I have been transported back 20 years to basic training. Now normally this would be great if I was transported with the 20 year old body I had back then, not the one I am currently cursed with. We get bussed to classes (when they show up on time) or we walk. We have these funny things called “General Rules” and the first one is NO Alcohol and NO “DSP”. This unfortunately stands for Drugs, Sex, or Porn. Now the drug part I understand, but the no Sex or Porn? Not so much. Not that there are a lot of young female soldiers looking for an old guy with a beer belly. It will be a very, very long 18 months.We had our Physical Training test, which consists of completing as many pushups and sit ups as you can in two minutes, followed by a two mile run. I did very well “for a guy my age” as most people tell me; 92 sit ups and 14:28 on the two mile run. My score came out to 197 points; I cannot do pushups due to a rotator cuff tear in my left shoulder. Many of the younger soldiers give me a lot of grief about my age (not that I don’t give them grief about anything I can think of) but I am happy to report that I beat the majority of their scores while only completing two events. Now this is where I would say you’re only as old as you feel but that would make me about 85 around now.We have been firing the M9 pistol and M4 rifle. The ranges have not been used since Geronimo was around and they are missing a few things; like shade and a place to sit. While we’re at the range in our full body armor and cavalar helmets (temps have been around 80 F) we are allowed to sit on the ground but not allowed to lie down. I think they are worried that we will get a bad sunburn on our faces. The M9 range lasted 15 hours and the M4 range was 17 hours (no shit!) with an MRE (Meal Rejected by Everyone) for lunch and warm chow on plastic plates for dinner. Did I mention there were no seats and not a tree in site? We were actually done about 1300 but had to wait until NIGHTFALL to practice firing the weapons at night. Now I thought flying at night without NVG’s was scary, try firing REAL bullets on a firing line next to a guy who you know had to go through the qualification 4 times before he got a passing score!
We have also completed a three hour class on Arabic. Not the culture….just the alphabet, along with common words and phrases that I do not remember. Three hours! On another day we did CWT (Common Warrior Training) this was a 12 hour day learning useful things such as how to set up a M34 claymore mine, how to shoot out a window, how to talk on a radio, and how to use NBC equipment. If I have to talk to any Iraqi, set up a claymore mine or shoot an M4 out a window things have gone terribly wrong! At least the sun was not out on that day, unfortunately the clouds had a little too much water content and we were rained on for most of it. Thank God, the wind was blowing at 25 knots all day! Oh yeah, no cover or seats at this location either.
I have not killed any of my roommates as of yet, the Army makes you turn in all your ammunition at the range and they take your weapon away from you when you return at night (around 2300). We will start flying here shortly but the aircraft will be taken to TX sometime in mid June, to be put on a ship for transport to Iraq. I can only lay awake at night in the fetal position in fear; trying to figure out what else Army will be “training” me to do.
I’ll keep in touch.EM
'Til Next Time!
Rev. Teri
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Week of May 21st
Keep smiling no matter what! Each of us have our own little 'spark' to light our way, and if you just fan the flame a little, that spark will grow into a raging torch to light not only your way, but the way of others. Not only that, but everyone will keep wondering what you are up to. I didn't realize that for a few days, my smile and light had been dimmed until friends Wayne and Kathleen approached me to make sure I was still OK... It's amazing what friends can do for one another! A small gesture or thought, and your whole demeanor and outlook can change. Give someone a hug today - and follow it up with a hearty, happy, "Good to see you." You'd be surprised how quickly both the hug giver and receiver will feel better!
Memorial Day is coming up, and if you have lost someone in any of our Nation's many conflicts past or present, my heart grieves with you. Next blog will be a message from a normal everyday Joe who has been uprooted from his day to day life to serve. It's a moving statement that you won't want to miss.
'Til Next Time!
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Week of May 14th
What news reaches our shores today? What great story is there to share? I have nothing planned for this posting. One of the wonders of this posting is often I do the best when I just let it flow out...
I hunger for the days that are sunny. In the Pacific Northwest, they are few and far between. The bright, blue skies filling the view. Soft fluffy clouds floating by as I sit on a grassy slope. Warm rays caressing my skin, melting all the wet miserable cold away. Meanwhile, someone in sub-Saharan Africa is dreaming of a drenching cold rain to bring life to their crops. We always want what we do not have.
The reason sunny days stand out HERE is that it is so wet and dark for a large percentage of our days. We grumble about what is the 'same-old, same-old'. Many of us take our faith and religion the same way. We grumble about the sameness of it all. If we are not happy in our spiritual lifes, we must seek change. Do you go to church because it is expected? Do you go there just to see your friends and acquaintances? Do you go just for the potluck dinners and socials? If the sameness is boring, then it is YOU who have made it so. God is a living, breathing entity that is far beyond our comprehension, but that does not mean you shouldn't try. What could you learn today about God? What could you learn today about faith?
Do you just 'follow along' with the sermon in the pulpit? Do you only know a few passages vaguely? What new message could you find if you read the Bible? Could you breathe new life into your belief by spreading your wings and moving outside your comfort zone? Do you know if your church has an adult study group? Are you a part of it? Anyone can lead a study group, for we are all students of life. Studies have shown that the 'mental decline' often seen in the elderly can be held to a minimum by learning something new daily. As everyone knows, faith will raise your emotional state... so combine the two! Keep your mental faculties acute and your heart glowing by studing the Bible. You'd be amazed how much more joy you can get out of the 'same-old, same-old'.
'Til Next Time!
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Week of May 7th
Thought of the week: When we make ourselves gods, who can we blame for both the good and bad? Do Humanists exclaim 'I Damn It'? and, "I bless you"?
I know the above takes the Humanist approach to the extreme, but who CAN you blame for the good and bad in your life if you believe you are in charge of your own destiny and can control your own universe? Who can you turn to for guidance and strength when you have suffered all that you can? Who can you ask for forgiveness? If we humans are indeed the most advanced and the only self aware beings in the universe, who can we look to for LIFE? Are we just random molecules that while spinning throughout the nothingness somehow came together to make sentient beings and a full world of flora and fauna?
Occam's Razor is a great scientific statement regarding burdens of proof. It states that when presented with two differing scenarios that show how something possibly happened, the simpler of the two is the most plausible. So let's take a look at the Humanists view versus the religious view of how we got here:
Humanist: somehow out of the nothingness, some random matter and energy came together to form the universe, and out of that nothingness came the entire table of elements that make up the stars, planets, and other planetary bodies. On one of these random rocks, there was the perfect combination of the elements along with a perfect combination of amount of matter to make our planet. On this planet, somehow the molecules managed to get together just right to form life. Then somehow that life went through millions of years of changes to arrive where we are now. We control our universe; it does not control us.
Religious: God had a plan. He executed it. We're here.
According to Occam's Razor, the simplest explanation is the most plausible. So what do YOU believe.
'Til Next Time!!
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Weeks of April 2007
I have taken some time to go visit my mother and father in New Mexico. Despite my knowledge that there is nothing that I can do to help with my dad's illness, I still felt the need to travel down there. It's a miracle that I could even feel that way. I have always been above average in intelligence and have always relied on that intelligence to guide me. I know in my heart of hearts I cannot help, but yet I felt the familial strings being pulled towards Alamogordo.
Because of my rather unemotional dad, when I visited my parents, it was not treated as a family reunion. It was treated more like a tourist trip - we went everywhere. Anything to keep from talking about what we should have been talking about - family. It is amazing how someone will keep up appearances just for the sake of it. Do you keep up appearances just for the sake of it? Do you not let your emotions show because you think it will make you seem weak? We were given the gifts of expression and love... should we waste them? Should we hide them in the dark for no one to see? Our light can be dimmed only by ourselves... no one can dim it for you. Take pride in your light. Let it shine throughout the darkest hours.
Good did come of my trip to Alamogordo. I got to see some of the most glorious sights. Carlsbad Caverns were absolutely stunning (and hard work to walk all the way through). The time it took nature to make the amazing formations is mind boggling. The stone looks like it could actually flow (and technically, it does. It just takes forever for it to do so.) The White Sands National Monument was incredible. It had rained in the recent past, and you could 'smell the beach'... the damp pure white sand smelled much like the beach here at home. The white sands come from a gypsum layer in the rock that over time has eroded down, revealing the gypsum. Our time upon the sands is but brief and our footsteps are quickly erased... time is a meaningless human invention. Nature has no use for time. God has no use for time. We are but twinkles in the sky full of time. Make the best out of your measure of time, whether you are allocated a cup or an ounce.
'Til Next Time!!
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Week of March 26th
Today's youth... our future. What has happened to our culture that our children are so uncaring, so ready to fight at the drop of a hat, so foolish as to believe they are the only people in the world that matter?? Where are the adults teaching the children, and what are they teaching them? I speak from the experience gained at a local community event for 6th graders. SIXTH GRADERS - you know, young... around 12... not quite teens, but not old enough to have lost all sense of child-like acceptance and innocence. Or have they? Has this current civilization degraded to the point that even children have lost their souls?
I play music for the local Parks & Rec department at a local health club. It's a short two hours. We keep the youngsters out of trouble for a few hours... it's not a solution to the world's problems, but every small step counts. Clark and I have been doing this literally years - once a month, every month, year after year. This has given me points of reference. When we first started, although the children were not what you would call polite, they were nice enough to ask if we would play their requests. These days, they demand their music, NOW!!! At first, the children would never think to ask for age inappropriate music - they just knew it wasn't going to be played. Now, they throw a temper tantrum if they cannot listen to the rudest cut of the most foul languaged song imaginable (some of these I wouldn't even play at bachelor or bachelorette parties, mind you.) But this latest outing proved the worst.
Sixth grade girls. Should they be fighting, tearing at each others hair in a bad impersonation of a Jerry Springer special? Obviously, they have been taught that it is appropriate to do so, because that's exactly the attitude we fought with the other night. And what were they fighting over? What else? Sixth grade boys! What is with our society that we allow our children to go out in clothing that prostitutes would find appropriate to work in? What is it that makes our children believe that the cursing, yelling, fighting, brawling attitude you used to only find in the worst of bars is now appropriate for public display?
I realize it is a different society than when I grew up. Believe me, I grew up a military brat and heard (and have since used) every word there is. But, even as a child, I knew what behavior was appropriate and what behavior was not. I wouldn't have been caught dead using language like that, and I knew that getting in a fight would have serious repercussions later. Where are the parents? Where are the other adult role models? Where are the boundaries? Who is teaching the kids to act like this?
An even better question is: why are we not stepping forward when we see this bad behavior and trying to correct it. Sure, at the dance the other night, we broke up the fight and stopped the bad behavior at that moment... but who else can step forward to teach them? Can You?
This goes back to your basic mental and spiritual makeup: Do you point out wrongs? Do you actively try to fix them? Do you go out of your way to help? If you answered no to any of these, then you need to consider this: If we do not teach the children today, what will we reap tomorrow?
Think about it.
'Til Next Time!
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Weeks of March 5th, 12th, and 19th (combined a three part series into one for posting)
Each day, we are provided with information that affects us and shapes us as human beings. This day, I received information that I could not ignore. My father had been having a few medical problems. He has a history of colon cancer, and had a major blood clot in his leg about 6 or 7 months ago. Now, he has cancer once again. When you look upon the fragility of life and the hardships that we face day in and day out, we are tempted to ask "Why?" "What does it all mean?" "Why does God do this to us?"
Sure... life isn't fair. But that doesn't mean we should blame God for the vagarities of life. Things happen. Sometimes they are good, sometimes they are bad. But each has a purpose... even if it is to remind us we are small and insignificant in the grand scheme of things, and that only God knows why.
Why not blame God? Is not God the reason we suffer? Could He not stop the bad from happening? Surely He can, but if nothing bad ever happened, how could we appreciate all that goes right? How could we not learn from our mistakes? How could we not learn the preciousness of his Gift of Life?
"What about the maimed innocent child? Or a child born with special needs? Surely God couldn't be punishing an innocent for no reason?" Are we not learning from the maimed or special needs child? As I have mentioned in previous posts, I was what is/was commonly referred to as a 'military brat', the daughter of an Air Force enlisted man. As such, we moved continually and I was exposed to many families and many individuals. In Alabama, we were housed near a duplex that held two special needs children... both older than I. Due to my parents financial circumstances, my mother worked part time, and I was watched by the mother of one of the special needs children. He was deaf. I learned some very basic sign language. I also learned patience (if you ever have to spell every word of a conversation, you'll see what I mean). The girl in the next duplex had cerebal palsy. Her motor skills were lacking - she had trouble walking and doing most activities. She couldn't form words and so she used signs, too. She had trouble even making her hands move the right way to sign. I learned what perserverance was from her. Together, those two taught me compassion. These were all important messages to learn at such a young age (I think I was about six at the time.)
What lessons did I learn from my father's cancer? What lessons am I still learning? Well, I learned that even a hero can be cut down years after a war from the lingering effects of the horrors they have experienced (his cancer is due to Agent Orange exposure.) I am reminded of all the souls that will come back either physically or mentally damaged in our current conflict. I am reminded of all those who did not or will not come back due to the war. I am reminded that our current world is not perfect, that we must struggle each day to make it better, and that war is a necessary evil to force change.
I have learned that even though many problems have existed between us, my dad is still my dad. His love and pride is still there no matter what comes between us. I learned that even a tough old guy can occasionally let his feelings show. I have learned that maybe I didn't grow up to be such a screw-up after all. I have accepted that my dad will not always be around, and his illness has reminded me to tell people, everyday, how I feel about them. Tomorrow may not come for us all. Forgive while you have a choice. Forgive while you have a chance. Love those who you love well, and let them know it.
I have also been reminded of the great love God has for each of us. It is much like my dad and I. Even though my dad and I have had problems between us, we still talk and get along. He still loves me. Same with God... I might not agree with everything that happens in life, but I know that God still loves and cares for us.
Life is worth living, but to make it so precious a Gift, it must be taken away. Believe in the Lord, and receive His precious Gift of Everlasting Life. Do so before it is too late. You may not get a 'wake-up call' and a warning that your time is near. Take advantage of today.
Think About IT!
'Til Next Time
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Week of February 26th
The shortest month of the year has seemed to me to be the longest of my life. Although it is not a matter of concern, I have still been 'cooped up' as I hobble around - no crutches now, but still without the full mobility I'd like. This period of my life has given me the time to reflect upon what I do and what I should do. How should we act in our daily lives? Most people give lip service to the Bible... most do not live it. I must admit, I am far from perfect. But I have come to believe that each day, we must stop with our busy lives and reflect upon what we have said and done. What could we have done better? What are we going to change for tomorrow?
Take stock each day. Pray each day for guidance. Search each day for what blessings you have received. They are there. You need only look. I complain about a minor ailment that has slowed me down, but it has probably been the greatest gift I have received lately. It has given me time to pause. It has given me time to pray. It has given me time to forgive. It has given me time to appreciate what greatness there is in the simple daily flow of life.
'Til Next Time!!
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Week of February 19th
It's amazing how we take everyday things for granted. I never have been one for strenuous activity... I'm too busy spending the weekdays until 5 or 6 at work, and then spending the evenings volunteering until 10 or 11. The truth is, now that I'm forced to slow down and now that I can't do what I'm used to, I'm not a very cheery person! I want to be running around making dinners up for thirty people.... I want to be walking around talking to those up at the Lodge where we spend a majority of our time volunteering for our community. I feel useless and helpless for a short time, then I take stock and realize that I am still helping. I still take money for the fundraisers... I still make the newsletters and flyers... I still do what I can.
I believe that's the entire lesson for this week. Even if you cannot go out and actively help someone with a 'meals on wheels' program, or help at a soup kitchen, or mow an elderly neighbor's yard, there's always SOMEthing we CAN do. Maybe it's crocheting a warm throw for a disabled veteran to keep his legs warm in his wheel chair. Maybe it's calling on the sick and the shut-in and making sure they have what they need. Maybe it's purchasing an extra can of soup or two for the food bank. Maybe it's giving a few pennies in the offering plate. Whatever you can find to do, it does help. If EVERYONE did what they could to make this world a better place, think what kind of world we would live in...
Give it some thought.
'Til Next Time!
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Week of February 12th
What a week I have had! Friday the 9th I went in for some minor knee surgery, and even though I was amazed how quickly I was up and moving, it still gave me some 'down-time' to think and reflect. I'm not used to staying still in one place for long. After all, I have my 'day job' plus my DJ business, and the ministry. Add into that all the hours I spend volunteering at our local Elks Lodge, and I have no time to put my feet up and relax. What did I find out while I was forced to endure some peaceful reflection? I found myself re-aligned back on track and refreshed - ready to go on with my journey.
I even went back through some old emails. I have kept many that have provided me with either a quick smile, a laugh, or a moment of deep thought. One that had always struck a cord with me is by Lorie, an old friend and former co-worker at my day job. She was one of the most petite people I have met that had such a strong belief and will of character that you forgot how small she was. She stood firm in her belief and did not mind that others knew what her convictions were. Unlike many who go to church on Sunday and then don't mention God the rest of the week, Lorie would acknowledge God daily. She would never push her religion on others, but let her strength shine for all to see. Lorie's life was not easy - she had many more roadblocks in her journey than most. But she never let it get the best of her for long. I would like to share the ONE EMAIL that to this day, I keep on my computer - ready to reinfornce and refresh me when the need arises. Out of the thousands I delete each month, you'll see why I keep this gem:
All is Well with My Soul
When the cares of today’s busy lifestyle start weighing me down, I pull up a comfortable chair, and retreat to my quiet place. My quiet place is a special place that exists only in my mind, a place where I sit with my Lord and we marvel at His creation and the changes He has brought to my life. It is here, in our quiet place, that Jesus reminds me, once again, that all is well with my soul.
First, I close my eyes and relax. Eventually, I start to feel the rough bark of the giant oak tree press gently into my back as a cool breeze softly kisses my face. The oak tree reminds me of the loving protection of my Lord. After allowing myself a moment to feel His strength, I then I take a long, deep breath and the sent of wildflowers and fresh spring grass act as an elixir on my tired mind.
Opening my eyes, I watch as my bare toes play in the sable, satin dirt beneath me. The coolness of the dirt reminding me that in Jesus I have rest and relief, that His burdens are light and that His path is easy. As I look up, the sun dances atop the ripples of the cornflower blue water. Sometimes, when the day has been especially difficult, I will go for a swim, allowing the water to wash away the tension from my tired muscles. Most of the time though, I just sit and gaze at the water as the Lord reminds me that it is His light that dances on top of His living water, and that I will not thirst again.
Eventually, a herd of wild horses will catch my attention as they jog across the rim of the rolling hills where fruit trees and wild flowers add splashes of color amidst the green grass. The horses remind me of the freedom I have in Christ, while the rolling hills remind me of the ups and downs of life, providing a stark contrast to the mountains, with their steep terrain and treacherous cliffs, which I had endured before I allowed Christ to fill my heart and be Lord over my life
Tomorrow may, once again, be hectic and filled with tribulations. I may stumble and fall. I may become weary as I struggle along my path. However, I know that the Lord Jesus is right there with me, helping me and guiding me and at the day’s end, I can once again, retreat to my quiet place with my Lord, and be reminded that all is well with my soul.
-Lora Lee Mattox (with the help of our Lord Jesus Christ)
And now you know how I have spent the past week - yes, in pain because of the surgery, and tired as well, but also rejoicing in the time I have spent in the simple reflection of life and God, and how each is touched by the Divine whether they realize it or not. I could not have expressed myself better than Lorie, and therefore will not even try.
'Til Next Time!
Rev. Teri
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Week of February 5th:
I have been astounded to find out that there are more miracles in our daily lives than we appreciate. If I say something miraculous happened to me, most people would either think I was crazy or overexaggerating. Often, we will say something is 'miraculous' - not knowing the 'why' or 'how' something works... But what happens when something is truly miraculous? Do we turn the other way, laugh it off, or dismiss the event? Or do we accept what has happened as the good that comes our way every day in little ways when we believe?
Just chatting with friends has shown me that God answers prayers - sometimes indirectly, sometimes directly. I was talking to my friends Nathan and Becky and they have given me another reason for hope and enlightenment. Becky's husband Stan had a diagnosis of a serious disease, a diagnosis that had previously been confirmed. Both Becky and Stan had seen some physical changes in Stan over this diagnosis. But the problem is no more. It just 'went away'. Nathan's wife Amy had a similar experience; a medical diagnosis of a life-threatening nature that just 'went away'. I had the same event happen to me about a year and a half ago. Do we just chalk it up to tests that were wrong or human error? Or do we accept that miracles do happen every day if we just open our hearts and minds?
I am not saying prayers necessarily will be answered in the affirmative. I do not subscribe to the idea that because you believe in a higher power, you will not get sick or that no evil will befall you. Rather, I truly in my heart believe that sometimes you'll get a much needed wake-up call to remind you where you stand. Your faith can carry you through the tough spots. Your belief in God can keep you going even though you face the trials of disease and death. The 'wake-up calls' we each receive remind each of us to remember the One who holds our destinies in His hands.
I talk here not only of the mysterious vanishing medical problems, but of the everyday dilemnas we all face. The miracle of the incredible sunset - vividly red, gold, and orange. The miracle of the house spared by the falling limb during the storm. The miracle of the skidding car - wrecked, but with no one inside of it hurt. Dare we question the bad that befalls us? Or should we greatly praise the bad that doesn't? The choice is each of ours, every day. Choose wisely - for you may not get a chance tomorrow to choose at all.
'Til next time!
Rev. Teri
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